Thursday, June 21, 2012



then my Miri friend will think that I am rich because i only go out with them once.
means i stay in room whenever i do not go out with them,
and don't spend.

then the friend i get to know through projects and activities will think that I am rich,
because I seldom go out with them.
when i am absence, means I am in the room,
saving up.

then my parents will think that I am rich, because I whenever i go out,
they will foot the bill.
and when they are not in KL, i am always in my room.
counting money.

oh oh oh.
this is how a person "richness" is determined.
the number of outings.

and i wont argue.
because, what's the point?

If there is a need to compare, then below is the list.
- i just paid RM1300 for my rental deposit. anyone doing so?
- i have a pending of RM 1100 to pay for 3 months rental, which only last till August. any suggestion i can skip that?
- for parents' day and parents' birthday, i spend RM 800 averagely, every year. i am just showing off, isn't it?
- present and gifts for family members, whenever i go home, is a must. and RM200-300 is just enough. oh, i should save that up, many may say.
- apart from that, all miscellaneous and outings do cost. well, that is what others are spending too, so skip that.

so, i am just showing off, huh?
with the rental and all, to tell the world i am going to continue my study.
with the parents gift, to tell the world how filial i am.
with the family gift, to tell the whole world how caring i am towards my family.

well, i dont know what to say or how to express my feeling.
just 1 thing.
i am just an ordinary girl.
i will like to spend money on pampering myself once in a while, which includes outings and buying stuff for myself.
and i love good delicious food, which usually cost more. so, once in a while, i will go ahead and forget about the price tag. just for a satisfying indulgence.
and i prefer outing with some others, not always the same group, because different group different feel.
and for the absence, i cant help it because either it is at the odd time or it is when i am back in my cozy home.
i dont think twice when coming to spending on my family. why? they are the closest people i have in this world. i think my parents deserve all the pampering and gifts. they are the one that give me such a good life and great environment when i am growing up, and i think that it is a responsible and reasonable thing to do, by saving up in somewhere to afford a good gift for them. if you think i am showing off, please do go ahead. and i like buying gifts for my brother and sister. why? i simply love to see their smiling face and delightful expression when receiving those thing. not expensive gifts but their smile is precious for me. God know how much i miss them here, i those smile, are the only thing i can bring along with me in my mind here.
and as a human, i need essentials to live on. they cost too.

so hey,
lesser outing with you guys dont means i dont go for outing and i dont spend.
i do. and a lot.
not blaming others, but just that it do hurt to see those comments.
and there is no where and no better way i can express them.

when things come to money, they turn nasty.
another lesson learnt, just shut up.
give less comment.

and lead my own life.
like mum say, i cant satisfy everyone.

**and i do miss home greatly now! :((**

1 comment:

Vee Tee said...

Dear Claire

I read your blog yesterday on SS2 pasar malam which accurately pressed the right buttons, especially the funny ones, and made me cry with laughter. Read more of your blogs in English (I am Chinese illiterate) and understood your "emos" of the young student days spent in the room, saving money ya! Missing family and places...... I am almost 60 now but you have touched my memories kept locked up all these years.

So, thank you for blogging and keep posting the beautiful poetry. May God bless you