comparison

LOL!!

then my Miri friend will think that I am rich because i only go out with them once.
means i stay in room whenever i do not go out with them,
and don't spend.

then the friend i get to know through projects and activities will think that I am rich,
because I seldom go out with them.
when i am absence, means I am in the room,
saving up.

then my parents will think that I am rich, because I whenever i go out,
they will foot the bill.
and when they are not in KL, i am always in my room.
counting money.

oh oh oh.
this is how a person "richness" is determined.
the number of outings.
GREAT!

and i wont argue.
why?
because, what's the point?

If there is a need to compare, then below is the list.
- i just paid RM1300 for my rental deposit. anyone doing so?
- i have a pending of RM 1100 to pay for 3 months rental, which only last till August. any suggestion i can skip that?
- for parents' day and parents' birthday, i spend RM 800 averagely, every year. i am just showing off, isn't it?
- present and gifts for family members, whenever i go home, is a must. and RM200-300 is just enough. oh, i should save that up, many may say.
- apart from that, all miscellaneous and outings do cost. well, that is what others are spending too, so skip that.

so, i am just showing off, huh?
with the rental and all, to tell the world i am going to continue my study.
with the parents gift, to tell the world how filial i am.
with the family gift, to tell the whole world how caring i am towards my family.

well, i dont know what to say or how to express my feeling.
just 1 thing.
i am just an ordinary girl.
i will like to spend money on pampering myself once in a while, which includes outings and buying stuff for myself.
and i love good delicious food, which usually cost more. so, once in a while, i will go ahead and forget about the price tag. just for a satisfying indulgence.
and i prefer outing with some others, not always the same group, because different group different feel.
and for the absence, i cant help it because either it is at the odd time or it is when i am back in my cozy home.
i dont think twice when coming to spending on my family. why? they are the closest people i have in this world. i think my parents deserve all the pampering and gifts. they are the one that give me such a good life and great environment when i am growing up, and i think that it is a responsible and reasonable thing to do, by saving up in somewhere to afford a good gift for them. if you think i am showing off, please do go ahead. and i like buying gifts for my brother and sister. why? i simply love to see their smiling face and delightful expression when receiving those thing. not expensive gifts but their smile is precious for me. God know how much i miss them here, i those smile, are the only thing i can bring along with me in my mind here.
and as a human, i need essentials to live on. they cost too.

so hey,
lesser outing with you guys dont means i dont go for outing and i dont spend.
i do. and a lot.
not blaming others, but just that it do hurt to see those comments.
and there is no where and no better way i can express them.

when things come to money, they turn nasty.
so,
another lesson learnt, just shut up.
give less comment.

and lead my own life.
like mum say, i cant satisfy everyone.





**and i do miss home greatly now! :((**